C-box

I have a conffesion to make . and I hope u do understand . If you're reading right now , take a magnifiying glass . My blogskin has limited amount of space , so I'll be clear with you . And I bet you know what I'm talking about . First of all , I want to say I do Love you still as a friend. as much as I treasure Friendship , you drove my limit of friendship to the extreme . I don't usually feel like this towards friends and like always , My prediction was correct and as much as I understand your flaws and have accepted it as much as I can , I'm Sick of you . I'm sick of your endless moodswing . I don't find moodswings exciting . I hate moodswing although it happens to me . I hate the fact that u easily get angry , offended .I'm sick of you Hitting people although in you opinion its your fun . But FYI , I'm not a toy . I've been extremely patient and like I did with my brother , I had ENOUGH. I know you put up with me too , but sometimes , when I spend some time with you , I just feel like running to the nearest hole and duck my head inside it like an ostrich . You demand alot of Attenion and I get what you mean . but sometimes , wj , Its just best look at people . as kind as you were . as willing as you were . as loyal as you were . as unique as you were . I had treasure my fun and I hope we can work it out .


this is gonna be a very holy week for all the catholics , angelic an , protestant u name it and ME as in I am ABSOLUTELY not HOLY . LITERALLY , I just went confession like last Thursday and let me tell you , i Broke the record for the shortest confession made . I mean I'm not clean or anything but I'm impressed I didn't do anything THAT bad ,at the starting of the year . actually i summarize everything . there was the usual and everything , but like every single confession I make every stinkin year of my life , there was something I realize . I grew up . yeah , weird. stupid. clueless . but ppl its the truth . I realize that I think before I act that I was able to SUMMARIZE everything in a matter or two sentences . the father said so too . 'its good . ur growing yp and started to take responsibility for ur actions . okayy , I'm nagging like and old woman and its getting for for my health .







Sara Bareilles "Love Song"


cs2, guess wat? I finally know how it feels like when you got dumped . It's not easy to shallow right?

Remember I told you about the guy .how we we're really good friends and he really helped me through the dark times when I couldn't find anyone and I felt really lonely sometimes when you're not with me . I'm still working on it . and eventually he came to have feelings and been giving me obvious signs yet I was too afraid to admit? he left me stuff and he moved away . we still chat through msn and we we're doing great . he wasn't who he used to be . and I really don't know how to communicate anymore . yet , shin , guess wat ? I still like him very much . weird huh? and we talked last night , and he keep asking about his 'there' punya friend. and it was a she . I was cool with that . but when she added me into the conversation , It sort off hit to me . the way they we're talkin? it was exactly the way we used to talk . and right there , it broke my heart . it was raw , unbearable , its not cancer . it's like literary squeezing my heart and letting it go and squeezing again . it really really hurt..shin.it really hurt and there we're tears . I haven't cried since i wan 6 you know . I called you but you we're still in tuition . and now , I don't know wat to do . I know what I should do . let him work his magic , maybe the other girl was better right? but I really don't want to see him just dating her right in front of me . but I know its good for him . I really dun know wat to do . work your magic chai chen shin .




blue October-hate me .
it's for him , it's like him . the only diff is that his skin is too thick to admit . he's wrong .

(If you're sleeping are you dreaming
If your dreaming are you dreaming of me?
I can't believe you actually picked me.)

(i Justin, this is your mother, and it's 2:33 on Monday afternoon.
I was just calling to see how you ware doing.
You sounded really uptight last night.
It made me a little nervous, and a l... and... well... it made me nervous, it sounded like you were nervous, too.
I just wanted to make sure you were really OK,
And wanted to see if you were checking in on your medication.
You know I love you, and...
Take care honey
I know you're under a lot of pressure.
See ya. Bye bye?

I have to block out thoughts of you so I don lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I alone
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you. Will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me?
It is I that wanted space

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you

Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what good for you

I sober now for 3 whole months it one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So Il drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn do for you

Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what good for you

And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes cry and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling ake it go away!?br> Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered ow can you do this to me??br>
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn do for you

Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what good for you
For you
For you
For you

[Children voices:]
If you're sleeping, are you dreaming,
if you're dreaming are you dreaming of me.
I can't believe you actually picked me

[Girl:] Hey Justin! [x12]


how to love addicts.

rolled in a corner ,
groaning in pain ,
my heart hurts ,
but I'm clean .

he hits ,
he yelled ,
he don't care ,
but I guess I still love him .

he's an ass ,
he's a jerk ,
he squeezes every single kind of love ,
I had for him .

I keep loving him ,
we keep loving him ,
we're blood ,
how can we not .

It hurts alot when you love an addict ,
It hurts alot to see them not knowing around them ,
It hurts alot you can't find a solution ,
It hurts alot when you know you can't run .


after being a teenager , I started to learn that , you have a choice . a choice to say no , a choice to love . and at first , being a rebel ,I told myself that I absolutely hate my family and everything , but growing up did help me alot . Eventually , it taught me what I have to know . as far as family goes , as time pass by , I sort off know what to face everyday . that there are so many types of ppl . but funnily even when I'm prepared , everyday with them is a surprise . yea sure , we fought alot . yea sure , we argue like theres no tomorrow . you sort off start to understand each other in another level . But lately , being 15 really is special . after arguing with my brother which I have been trying to avoid for a very long time . and I plan my stuff properly so I don't have to fight with him . but , yea , unavoidable . kids , online game is addictive . and its no different than drugs . the only different is it can be controlled . it depends on you . But i hope you guys we're not as cold-blooded , selfish ,tactless as my brother . as much as I really love him , but as times passes by , I really don't know how to continue loving his flaws . when it get more and more . but I guess I have to accept the fact about it . adios . see life positively friend